NASA scientist explains why astronauts shouldn’t masturbate in zero gravity

Astronauts have been warned against masturbating in space due to concerns that female astronauts could become pregnant from stray fluids.

There are strict rules regarding being on board in zero gravity. Scientists warned that even the slightest drop could cause havoc on board.

Late at night, TV presenter Conan O’Brien got into an uncomfortable subject during an interview with a NASA engineer, asking him if he had ever sent pornography to the International Space Station.

“No, nothing like that,” said scientist Smythe.

“Does porn work in zero gravity? He’s everywhere,’ Conan tried.

“Three female astronauts can be impregnated by the same man during the same session… it finds its way,” the scientist continued.

According to American astronomer Dr. John Millis, sex and masturbation in space is a logistical nightmare, with problems ranging from floating liquids to manhood reduction.

He compared sex in space to intercourse while “skydiving”, but added that it was “not impossible”.

Presumably the cosmonauts had this in mind when the Kremlin spermologists knocked.

Russian scientist Dr. Irina Ogneva asked male cosmonauts to provide sperm samples back in 2019.

“There are no astronauts who want to,” she said.

Originally published as NASA scientist explains why astronauts shouldn’t masturbate in zero gravity